I must admit that I’ve certainly had a hard time keeping solidly to my practice since our daughter was born almost a month ago. Time to read and quietly reflect on things has been nearly nonexistent, and the activities of the home have been very effective at dragging my mind from one thing to the next in an almost automated fashion. If I have a spare moment, my mind wanders in an erratic manner, which can be quite disturbing at times… and you might imagine that any intention of serious meditation practice has been nearly completely halted for the moment.
Oddly, when I’m at work, I feel almost as though my practice; my mindfulness in general is much better.
At home, I am surrounded by a great many attachments, namely my family. This certainly will not be something I simply drop by the wayside, but I can envision the most afflictive facets of this easing as my wife returns to work, as our newest child grows older, and as I find new and creative ways to build up my practice. Some of this will be because it is easier to not worry about a child that isn’t so helpless, but certainly some will be the result of my own personal development of mind as I work more intently towards my own personal “baby steps” in life.
Perhaps some help will also come from the re-establishment of a regular sleep pattern, which will undoubtedly come about as the baby ages.
So I guess the main thing I’m getting at is the fact that changes in life expose a lot of untidy bits in the mind, sorta like blowing your breath onto a dusty bookcase will bring about a cloud of dust or shining a flashlight into a dark, dank room may reveal mold. The condition existed previously, but now we can see it for what it is. On each occasion when we have this realization, we can choose to either ignore it (letting the dust settle or mold remain) or to clean house.
Therein seems to lie a true challenge of the mind.
Today I reaffirm the intention to eliminate the clutter of my mind in the same manner one might remove old things from a basement or garage and throw them in the garbage. Consider it a mental wholesale slaughter on the miscellaneous. I not only can and will, but must sustain progress along this course, hacking away at each defiling wrong view as I see it. Only through such vigor does one have any hope of enlightenment in the future.
Thank you for reading. May you find happiness today, friends.